Run@way

I run away
From everything dear.
From everything that speaks of bonds-
As it creates bondages.
I run away in my mind-
From you-
'Coz it's you to whom I belong.
But who must hurt me again.
Isn't that the natural path-
Of decease and its disease ?
I move away-
From the mist of magic-
Its sultry in its seduction-
That traps me in its honeycomb.
I succumb-
To the cyst of logic-
That's killed my wombed dreams-
Shattered shells lie trodden.
Trust on tryst lies misplaced,
As destiny and fate seem hollow words,
To me.
We had to meet-
Only to part, I feel.
I try to barricade myself,
From your advance-
Your embrace completes me.
I long for the shelter your arms give,
The surety your presence imparts-
But everytime our eyes meet -
My eyes stray to the imaginary clock ticking by-
Counting seconds-
Counting stars.
I am lost in your glow-
Pulled to you like a moth to a flame-
But do fireflies burn in their own fire too?
I feel sated-
With you.
Yet back of my mind-
I stare at days of without you.
It's hard, for me-
To see life sans you.
But that seems an inevitability-
Which we cannot escape.
We say the three words of love,
With all the truth that we can muster.
We look deep into each others' eyes-
As we breathe in the scent-
Wishing time stood still.
My long winding path of life,
Seems hazy and blurred ahead-
As the only concrete I could ever see-
But for my own sanity,
I have to see that crumble too.
I would not want to pick up the pieces ever.
The pain seems to be an iridescent part of me already.

The flotsam

Light and slight,
The flotsam floated along
Its flow of plight.
The shore hard to judge,
Nowhere in sight.
The waves brought foam to mouth,
As the salted eyes,
Found it difficult to focus.
Noir beseeched the mind
As dreams that seemed to real,
Now seemed hard to chase.
The paper shards,
Fell around like brittle glass-
Reflections of all the bitterness,
That lacked a vent.
The spindled body,
Tough and hard against
The current-
Corseted the corpse,
That decayed within.
The arrhythmic heart beats
Testified to all that rot inside.
Crushed and suffused,
The red of love-noise-
Rose up as smoked ash-
To find solace in the grey clouds.
Lightning now,
Could illumine no way-
As the weary mind,
Sought its escape,
From the folly that the
Sands of Time entailed-
Or perhaps it was the mind's mistake as well.
The lackluster spirit awaited the final end-
Rooted to its place sunless.
The floating tide swept it along
Its way- away-
As the flotsam prayed for Death
As its ultimate release
From all the shades of sham
It faced.

A Date with Fate

I wait for the end,
As the pain seems too much to bear.
Suffering be optional.
Yet tryst with it seems a must.
The sparkles of joy amiss,
The weary eyes,
Stare unblinking at the horizon.
The peace that the end might give,
Seems tantalizing and elusive.
It skirts hold
While the greyness
Of the way appears cold.
Aloof from all the music that plays around-
The pale face unable to emote-
The streaks of kohl settle as deep orbs
Of liquid pain.
Loveless or lovelorn,
The feet allow themselves be dragged-
In the slow pace of dichotomy.
The dry eyes,
Envision a tortured portrait of you and I-
The drumbeats fading out
While the barren desert awaits its Shaman,
To chant for death.
The mind traces patterns across all the Faces,
She has seen-
Yet in crowd,
She dilated pupils seek the only one known.
The grimness shows as a straight line,
As realization dawns that mercy remains,
At the hands of her keeper.
Bottled up in the queer spirit
Of bitter bilious love-
That gags her as it spreads through her-
Restraining speech-
Her silent plea for justice. 

Up in the air

Up in the air,
A thousand miles away and afar-
I let my eyes kiss the horizon,
Daring to look beyond
The clouds that clog my vision.
I find myself dissolving,
Lost in thoughts and prayers,
My mind filled with the images
That I see everyday.
Which dominate my every living second.
I find myself doing the unthinkable.
Lips moving,
I let my soul free from its iron cage.
To spread its wings and whisper the words
That I store in my dark.
Up in the air
I let my thoughts take shape
Form a meaning.
My reason for living now-
All my dreams pinned to one hope.
That strangely seems unreal.
I feel removed,
Much removed from everything,
Numbed be my senses,
As my mind focuses on the rigid chant
Of words.
Unsure of what to place belief in,
The images that seem to
Plague me every minute.
The silent hope that placates my mind.
The belief in a conspiring universe.
Or the harsh and ugly truth of a blind alley.
Footprints in the dark,
My hands reach out to the shadows
To keep me steady.
Barely able to keep,
My sanity in check,
I force the images fade out.
But its always the whisper
That hangs in the wind.
I want to let go,
Give up the fight,
Tell my heart otherwise.
But everytime these images
Of your arms around me
Drug me to dream bigger.
Helpless I await
For the embers to settle in
While the ash turns sooty.
The glow that keeps me warm-
To fade.
While my heart refuses to understand
What rots my mind distraught.
Powerless thus,
Up in the air,
I stare at my own fool's paradise.

Walk on

Resigned eyes,
Meet the assigned fate.
Numb veins pulsate suddenly,
With a source of the known.
Dragged and stretched beyond strains,
Burnt down to the ground
The elastic chord of being and feeling-
Find some life returning.
The vacant eyes peered in closer-
Squinting against the dazzling daylight,
With the blinders finally off-
The soul allows itself to be sold.
The wind screeches by,
A reflection of the hollowness within.
While the craggy footsteps,
Find their own path-
Away from the filter of rays.
Darkness is all that the mind seeks,
To burrow itself in -
A cocoon against the information overload.
The child holds her ears,
As she hears all over again
The hated words her brain re-tells.
She looks down with a wry amusement,
At the broken pearl shells -
The whites greyed and faded-
Serrated edges reflecting the words shattered.
Walk on is all she knows.
Away and afar-
From all that breaks.
Yet all shadows too remain sliced.
The reality seems to bleached to have a life.

Mangel

I have seen the winters with you,
Seen through the shards,
To look beyond,
And into you.
To peel the layers,
And peep into your inner being.
What I found,
Is what I'd always known.
A radiant soul,
Sheathed in its own luminosity
Of wisdom and spirit.
The eyes that met mine,
Were captivating in their own essence-
Reflecting me-
As if the years spanned across lifetimes.
With my head on your shoulder-
Comfortably ensconced in its shelter,
I thought back to my own acceptance
Of you, in my world-
While you waited
With your arms outstretched
To make me  break my own shackles
Of caution and skepticism
And follow my heart again.
Breathing in deeper,
The smell of you,
I let my mind wander,
To the glow that you'd brought me-
As your love elevated me to a pedestal
Much beyond the line of sight.
Its a special place-
Where you've put me up so high.
Looking down-
I can only see the million millipedes
As they scatter about-
Plagued by their own normalcy.
Looking at your profile now,
As you drive,
I utter a quick prayer
Of gratitude -
Still struck by wonder-
At the truth of your love-
That won me over me.
And makes me love you more
With every passing day.
In life perhaps then,
I can never thank you more-
For loving my dark
And letting me see your light.
Serenity shines all over me,
As the innocence of the honey-laden days,
Fawn over me in their still-nascence.
While I let me feelings guide me-
No longer letting my illogical mind,
Mind my ways.
I look at you,
Starry eyed- mayhaps-
At the carved features-
Silvery in moonbeam-
And move in closer to you-
To feel you more-
Touch your reality-
As I liken you to
Nothing short of an Angel.

Strange love

The much known eyes,

Looked at each other-

Lifeless in their spark.

A watchful haze unsettled the space,

As the hawk-like gaze,

Awaited any sign of the old.

The warm fingers clasped the dead hand,

In vain attempts to re-start.

While the lips moved,

They spoke words, not believed in.

Faithless and empty,

She nursed her defense,

A vacant wall against his hopes.

Images drawn from the past.

Did little to evoke any emotions.

They only served to hurt,

As they impinged on the door,

Of what it could it have been.

The end had startled both-

Though expected,

Its final blow,

Or death knell,

Was unanticipated in its severity.

And no matter, the questions now,

The ice refuses to thaw.

Love is then,

Just a game of cards-

She thinks-

One wrong move,

And all dreams come,

Tumbling and  crumbling down.

The fear of the future pervades,

Like an ugly stench,

It settles on the lovers,

Now strangers unknown.

She flees away to her own space in her mind-

While he tries to undo and rewind.

Strength seems the signature of their personalities,

But harshness is what they seem to bestow 

On one another.

Seeing the worst,

They apprehend the same from nameless others,

Whom they know would flitter through.

In their lives once again-

As they would let the light in.

They remain silent,

Unsated-yet lost in the myriads questions.

Looking time and again,

To the erstwhile half,

And shaking their heads in 

Bewilderment-

Of the sudden twist and turn in their tale.

The shards of glass remain unheeded to,

While the mirror between them,

Remains shattered in a million pieces.