Messy

A messed up mind,

Is what I am left with-

With thoughts,  right or wrong-

I cant really perceive.

Distance seems greater

Each time.

As I try to reconnect.

Rebond?

 A joke.

All I know ,

Is that I’m

Going with the flow.

Loving it…

And hating it-

As well.

I’m leading

A different life now.

Far away

From the one

I’d known.

The fresh air-

A respite.

But at what price?

It’s a paradigm shift almost.

Yet I cant seem to

Press the delete option.

Life’s taken a strange turn.

Suddenly I’m at crossroads.

Unknown - so far-

Lies the right direction.

Where should the right direction point to?

Will it be

A lasting “pleasant surprise?”

Or a negation

Of the new-

Retracing the footprints-

Lost in the sands of time?

How did I dig my own grave?

When will I wake up?

And see the sun rise,

In the right east?

Or is it too bad to,

Drift aimless in your dream?

Floating on- 

Waiting for the Messiah-

To signal the Beginning,

Of the End.

And the Awakening.

Sometime Back In the Not So Distant PAST

Frayed emotions,
Too burnt.
A mind gone numb,
Listening to none.
Yet hearing it all.
Spaced out-
Glazed eyes-
Sees it all,
Where it tries not to look.
Acceptance now,
Comes at a price.
The heart drained,
Of all hopes-
All reasons.
Trust lies in in bursts,
Of ashes.
Trampled by the,
Burden of Wait.
Impatience creeps in,
Damaging the distance.
The lack of shelter-
The loss of control-
Irreparable.
The consequences-
Irrevocable.
Inevitable.

Golden Orbs

Golden orbs of fire,
Danced and Watered,
As I sat ,
Staring at them,
A feet apart.
My own,
Fixated at the vision,
Dreamt about,
For so many nights.
Transfixed,
Held by the moment,
We both sat frozen,
Still caught in the shackles of Time.
The embers, still smoldering within.
Not much had changed.
Yet there was a certain sense of reserve.
We had pulled back.
From all that we'd held dear.
The past,
Not playing the victim,
Anymore.
We had perhaps grown up
A little.
Moved on,
Some more.
We shan't cross
That line- ever.
A willing
Suspension of disbelief,
At the passage of so
Many dry days,
And blurred nights,
Flashed past us.
For we could still not
Deny, the child in us.
That could only break free,
In each other's company.
Yet we had chosen different paths now.
We must walk on.
Golden orbs can never
Defeat me.
Nor shall I ever fight them.
What is entrenched,
Is still deeply rooted.
A piece of me,
Held constant- still.
Amidst all the buzz,
In my mind-
I still pray for
Your victory-
Against all odds,
That had always seemed,
Stacked against you.
May you,
Never lose your sense
Of wonder.
May you still go on,
Golden orbs,
Shall never lose their fire.
A passive me,
Would be as watchful,
As ever.