Simulacrum- A Simulation..

Its funny,
When I look back now.
At all the promises,
That had to bite the dust
So soon.
All the fiery words-
Lay in smouldering ashes
Of mistrust.
Finally- the bond-
Was snapped.
The last thread
Of control-
Vanished overnight.
Self-respect, love for self-
Could live in denial,
No more.
The ugly head of arrogance,
Had to raise its head-
Eventually.
Ego flared up-
As logic crumbled.
Like a loosely bound,
Pack of cards.
An ironical humour,
Crosses my thoughts.
At the peurile folly of it all.
Regret??
No place for a secondary association.
Life is still apace-
In its many hazes and mazes.
Why live in crushed hopes?
When all that we had lived for
Was a simulacrum-
Asimulation of our twisted thoughts?

Messy

A messed up mind,

Is what I am left with-

With thoughts,  right or wrong-

I cant really perceive.

Distance seems greater

Each time.

As I try to reconnect.

Rebond?

 A joke.

All I know ,

Is that I’m

Going with the flow.

Loving it…

And hating it-

As well.

I’m leading

A different life now.

Far away

From the one

I’d known.

The fresh air-

A respite.

But at what price?

It’s a paradigm shift almost.

Yet I cant seem to

Press the delete option.

Life’s taken a strange turn.

Suddenly I’m at crossroads.

Unknown - so far-

Lies the right direction.

Where should the right direction point to?

Will it be

A lasting “pleasant surprise?”

Or a negation

Of the new-

Retracing the footprints-

Lost in the sands of time?

How did I dig my own grave?

When will I wake up?

And see the sun rise,

In the right east?

Or is it too bad to,

Drift aimless in your dream?

Floating on- 

Waiting for the Messiah-

To signal the Beginning,

Of the End.

And the Awakening.

Sometime Back In the Not So Distant PAST

Frayed emotions,
Too burnt.
A mind gone numb,
Listening to none.
Yet hearing it all.
Spaced out-
Glazed eyes-
Sees it all,
Where it tries not to look.
Acceptance now,
Comes at a price.
The heart drained,
Of all hopes-
All reasons.
Trust lies in in bursts,
Of ashes.
Trampled by the,
Burden of Wait.
Impatience creeps in,
Damaging the distance.
The lack of shelter-
The loss of control-
Irreparable.
The consequences-
Irrevocable.
Inevitable.

Golden Orbs

Golden orbs of fire,
Danced and Watered,
As I sat ,
Staring at them,
A feet apart.
My own,
Fixated at the vision,
Dreamt about,
For so many nights.
Transfixed,
Held by the moment,
We both sat frozen,
Still caught in the shackles of Time.
The embers, still smoldering within.
Not much had changed.
Yet there was a certain sense of reserve.
We had pulled back.
From all that we'd held dear.
The past,
Not playing the victim,
Anymore.
We had perhaps grown up
A little.
Moved on,
Some more.
We shan't cross
That line- ever.
A willing
Suspension of disbelief,
At the passage of so
Many dry days,
And blurred nights,
Flashed past us.
For we could still not
Deny, the child in us.
That could only break free,
In each other's company.
Yet we had chosen different paths now.
We must walk on.
Golden orbs can never
Defeat me.
Nor shall I ever fight them.
What is entrenched,
Is still deeply rooted.
A piece of me,
Held constant- still.
Amidst all the buzz,
In my mind-
I still pray for
Your victory-
Against all odds,
That had always seemed,
Stacked against you.
May you,
Never lose your sense
Of wonder.
May you still go on,
Golden orbs,
Shall never lose their fire.
A passive me,
Would be as watchful,
As ever.

Goa

Golden sands,
Smooth to touch;
Walking barefeet,
With clasped hands.
Footprints scattered,
In watery marks.
Yellow sands,
Glinting in the golden hue.
Blue skies that smile down
On the shaded eyes.
Carefree laughter,
And the idle minds.
Beer Days
And Rum Nights,
The hookah smoke
Swirled high-
Fines paid
And laws escaped.
Wild days,
Wet nights.
7 friends,
On a dream run.
In a dream land-
For which,
They had lived through
So many days-
Counting and Waiting.
And finally realized.
Golden hopes
Of  Golden sands.
That was Goa,
For us all.

U 2..

,

So beautiful,
Beside you-
Her face,
Shines out radiant-
In its innocent glow.
The softness of her frame,
Sheathed in  warmth -
In sync-
With the hardness of your presence.
She complements you,
In every way.
What is felt thus,
Is seen.
You seem free too.
Of the burden of,
The shadows left behind.
Your world is suddenly light,
Filled with ,
The soft hues,
Of new love.
Happy am I,
As I rest easy too.
Knowing very well-
There's no more place
For me in your life.
Our journey today,
Has reached its end.
And there's only peace
In the knowledge.
Freedom in realization of,
Sanity again.
Your joyous smile,
Makes it all worthwhile.
The green flame is ebbed.
Seeing that look in your eyes,
For someone else.
Brown and Green
Have parted ways.
Its thus time
For a new July
To lead the way.
So carry on,
I say.
Goodluck and Godspeed,
May all the right dreams now,
Always illumine
Your way.

Aint it Funny

.

It's funny how I
Look at you,
These days-
Feel and not yet so
I refrain
I restrain.
The distance seems
Greater everyday.
Shan't bridge the gap.
You're too far away-
I can only remain afar
And watch.
Let the time fly by-
Till I decide to react again.
When all things are clear,
And the answers are with me
Again.